![The Rollercoaster of 2020](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/665bcd5d6c3da5558148250e/1717292401065-2A84MAIT9I401FI6GMO1/BlogThumbnail.jpg)
The Rollercoaster of 2020
I don’t think any of us could have predicted the overwhelming rollercoaster that has been 2020. The pandemic has reminded us that there is a lot in life that we can't control. We CAN control how we respond, how we choose to spend our time, and how much we love ourselves and others.
Sometimes Life is Hard
Some days are harder than others. I’ve run into some friends lately who are like, “How are you? It looks like things are going well based on Instagram/Facebook!” I realize that I do try to focus on the positive especially with what I’m posting on social media, and that’s because I know what we think about expands. I don’t dwell on little negative things these days and have grown a lot in the past 5 years. I find that filling my mind/attention with information on healing and positive things is helpful, especially with a brain that never seems to stop. In general, life is great and I am very happy.
But sometimes, life is hard. Sometimes it’s hard to focus and I find myself avoiding being present and fall back into old unhealthy patterns. Sometimes anxiety has more control than I’d like and I have a hard time accepting that.
Three Nights of Solitude
Prior to arrival at Windridge Solitude, I was prepared to have a mental breakdown of some sort. I knew that three nights alone in a cottage with no technology, books, or music was going to be a challenge and I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to handle it. I was a bit surprised and very happy that I didn’t actually have any breakdowns at all and loved every moment of solitude.
First Christmas in St. Louis (2015)
In general, I enjoy the holiday season. I went on a group walk last weekend to look at Christmas lights and was the goofy one running ahead and getting giddy over different displays. I'm definitely not a Grinch.
However, this year is the first year that I'm really realizing how hard the holidays can be for people dealing with issues of any kind (grief, loss, illness, broken families, addiction, violence, trauma, other mental health issues, isolation, etc.).